Random Friday: On spoilers, Xbox mouse support, and stupidity

ACSyndicateClock
Random Friday pic from Assassin’s Creed: Syndicate

It’s Friday, and I need a break from the doom ‘n gloom, so I’ve decided that random Friday blogs are going to be a thing. Probably. Ok, today they’re a thing.

If you let me use a keyboard and mouse with my Xbox without having to go through a lot of fuss, then I’ll probably start playing almost every game on Xbox.

I totally get why this is a concern for PvP, because I’m a living example of those concerns. When it comes to FPS, I can hold my own… on my PC, with a keyboard and mouse. Put a controller in my hand, and my aiming method consists of moving laterally while awkwardly trying to keep the crosshairs at a more-or-less consistent height that covers most baddies. Third-person shooters are about the same. I’ve improved a little over time, but not a lot. It’s sad. I can get by with this method if I’m playing solo, but I would suck massively at PvP with a controller.

But here’s the thing: I don’t do PvP. Give me plug&play keyboard and mouse support, and I’ll probably end up slowly transferring much of my gaming focus from PC to Xbox. Gaming on PC is awesome, but it also means compulsive rounds of “check GPU temp, check health, check temp, check surroundings, check temp, check ammo, check temp, check for creepydeadgirlstryingtokillme…” I can’t help myself. It’s like a sickness. And when a good graphics card costs about the same as an Xbox One X, well…

AIM, AOL’s instant messenger service, is shutting down, apparently.

And all I could think was… holy shit, are people still USING that? It’s been so long, I can’t even remember what my user name was. No clue.

Wolfenstein is still anti-Nazi, and waaaaaaaaahhhh

Apparently, Bethesda’s #NoMoreNazis ad campaign for the upcoming Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus is ticking some people off. Which… really says it all right there.

Let’s look at the facts. I know that’s not really a popular idea with some people, but… yay, facts: Castle Wolfenstein was released in 1981 for cutting-edge systems like the Apple 2 and Commodore 64. That was thirty-six years ago. And shit, do I feel old now–I had a Commodore 64 when I was a kid. (Radar Rat Race, anyone? That “music” still haunts me to this day…)

Castle Wolfenstein was about an operative fighting against the Nazis. Every Wolfenstein game ever made basically boils down to “Nazis are bad.” No, the franchise isn’t just cashing in on current events–it’s doing the same thing it’s been doing for thirty-six years. It’s current events that have gone completely sideways when “Nazis are bad” is suddenly a “controversial political statement“.

Fuck that. Nazis are bad. Kudos to Bethesda for not backing down.

I have a real problem with spoilers, and this is why.

*Fight Club spoilers ahead*

Back in the year 2000ish, I had the following phone conversation with a friend:

Him: “What did you do last night?”

Me: “I rented Fight Club and finally sat down to watch it last night, but…”

Him: “Were you surprised when it turned out that they were the same person and he was just talking to himself the whole time? I mean, did you see it coming?”

Me: “… … … … … … but I was totally exhausted, so I only managed to make it through the first twenty minutes before I had to go to bed.”

I was so mad that he’d spoiled the entire damn movie that I returned it to the video store without watching the rest of it. I swore that I wouldn’t try to watch it again until I was at least 75% over the horrible thing he’d just done to me. Maybe 60%. No less than 60% over it.

I finally sat down and watched the whole movie two weeks ago. I’m still not really over it, but I was bored.

You might be wondering what happened to the heinous spoiler troll. Spoily McSpoilerson. Captain Spoileriffic. No, I didn’t bury him in the back yard or leave his body in the desert for the coyotes to snack on. I did something way worse. I married him. Someone obviously needed to take one for the team and get him off the streets.


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