Games I love, but don’t even play. It’s a thing.

RDRsky
Who’s ready for RDR 2? It better not suck. I’m just sayin’.

Eve Online is the best game I’ve never played.

I love hearing stories about Eve Online. I’ve never installed, let alone played, the game, and I don’t intend to. Ever.

Here’s the thing: what I know about Eve Online makes me think that my temperament plus this game would equal disaster. You know how you hate griefing? Griefing has a new meaning in Eve Online, because most of what you might consider griefing in other games is just a part of life in EO. Deliberately. Stealing? Fine. Mugging? Fine. Extortion? Fine. It’s all about freedom. And profit. There’s a lot to the game, and my understanding is based on what I’ve read over the years, so it’s entirely possible that I’m being too cautious. I don’t think so, though. I’m too competitive, too temperamental, and too much of a game-loner to feel like EO would be a good idea for me. I may be missing out, but I think I’m better off on this side of the line.

Stories about the game are a hell of a lot of fun to read, though.

My all-time favorite story about any game, ever, is the 2005 Eve Online assassination contract that played out like an Ocean’s Eleven apocalypse in space. This story started my from-a-distance fascination with Eve Online. The idea of running long-term infiltration-and-assassination con games makes my brain tingle, and I can’t help saluting anyone who has this kind of dedication. Hell, we can’t get Thing 2 to stick to rudimentary tactics — like, say, “Quit running ahead and stay with the group!” — in Borderlands 2. I can’t imagine coordinating a strategy that spans months, involves dozens of players, and requires that kind of patience. Well, no… that bit, I can imagine. It’s the idea of having people who can actually pull it off that boggles the mind. Where do you find people capable of sustaining that kind of effort in a freaking MMO? Apparently, they’re all playing Eve Online.

Yesterday, word went out that a massive battle was about to go down, but the best part wasn’t how much was on the line, or how many people were involved, it was the backstories being circulated.

How perfect is this? I mean, really? I’m one of those people who loves hearing EO war stories. Somebody decides to try to get a book written about one of them, and the fallout leads to another war with a great story behind it. It’s like Eve Online is caught in a wormhole made of irony. I don’t like reality TV, but this? If this was a show, I’d totally watch it.

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This pic is here because I mentioned Borderlands 2. You know… in passing. And also because at one point, I went on a weird kick and took screenshots of every NPC intro.

PUBG is the second-best game I’ve never played.

I kept meaning to pick up PlayerUnknown’s Battlegrounds via Steam, and somehow just never got around to it. I don’t like PvP as a general rule, but this actually sounded like something I could get into. Maybe. The idea of going it alone is more attractive — to me — than team-based games ever are.

Except somewhere along the way, I turned into a minor PUBG-stream junkie. I still haven’t played the damn game, but I get a kick out of watching it. It all started when I  accidentally ended up spending most of a Friday evening watching other people playing PUBG. I ran across a channel randomly, and then just couldn’t stop watching it. I mean, yeah, I was doing other things… sort of… and it was just in the background, kinda… except… shut up.

I usually can’t stand to watch other people play games. The urge to yank the controller/mouse/etc. out of their hands and scream, “YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG!!!” is overwhelming. But for some reason, PUBG is just a hell of a lot of fun to watch.

Someday, I’ll get around to actually playing it. Probably. Maybe.

This isn’t a new thing.

I had zero interest in actually stepping into World of Warcraft’s arena, but watching the championships was oddly addictive. I’ve gotten sucked into CS:GO tourneys like you wouldn’t believe. The weird thing is that I never set out to watch anything on purpose — it just sort of happens to me. I paid for BlizzCon a couple of times just to get the swag, but then ended up staring at the screen for hours. Twitch and Mixer have a sinister ability to dangle intriguing broadcasts in front of my nose. Damn them.

And don’t get me started on Friday the 13th. Watching people play that game is just hilarious.

GTAVburn.png
GTA V. Every time someone mentions Far Cry 5, this image comes to mind. But that’s probably just because Trevor.

A few release dates of note.

March 20 – Sea of Thieves: The initial reports about this game were either wildly wrong, or they decided to change directions. Or they were using words that meant one thing, while other people thought they meant something else. Or the initial descriptions were vague, and people jumped to conclusions, and then the words got better. Whatever happened, my initial impression of what this game would be was very different from what they actually built. I was once excited for this game, and now I’m not. Which is too bad.

March 27 – Far Cry 5: I’ve never been excited about a Far Cry game before. Interested, yes. Preordered, yes. Played the hell out of, yes. But for some reason, I never really got  excited. I’m not entirely certain why I am now, except that Far Cry 5 seems to have tripped some kind of trigger in my brain. Something is… resonating… in a way it didn’t before. What could that be? Hmm. Whatever it is, I’m actually excited to see the game transplanted to the US. Exotic locations were part of FC’s charm, but I think it’s about time that these concepts hit home. In a game, I mean. Right. The ability to actually make our own danged character is nice, too.

March 31 – Crackdown 3: Ok, at one point I was sort of looking forward to this one. Then there was stuff. Like delays. And info about destructibility in online multiplayer vs. campaign mode. And then delays. And a weird little, “It’s not Crackdown 3, it’s just Crackdown! No, wait, it’s Crackdown 3…” situation that just came across as strange and disorganized. Now that it’s (theoretically) almost here, I’m just not caring much.

There are other games being released over the next few months, but I’m feeling a bit meh about the lot of them. The first quarter of 2018 is looking pretty quiet for me, with the exception of Far Cry 5. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. I can use the time to play all the other stuff I hardly have time for. Sigh.

It’s leaving me with a bit of post-holiday blah, is what it’s doing. Which is silly, considering all the stuff I have lined up. There’s a ton of content I haven’t seen in AC: Origins. I still need to settle down and really play through Skyrim VR, given that that was the whole reason I went VR in the first place. I’m ready to start Wolfenstein 2.

Hell, I need to finish Persona 5. My game time is well over 100 hours, but I got stuck in the last bit and decided that I needed a short break before the final push. And does anyone else wander through the world with that music stuck in their heads? I swear, it’s invaded my dreams.


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